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something to keep me occupied while i can't sleep...
1. I remember arriving at Mirabel airport when I was about 5. It was just before Christmas, about midnight, and Montreal was lit up as only Montreal can be, with thousands of lights and the distinctive patterns of the Island and shores. The mountain fairly glowed and the plane circled a few times before setting down. We were met by my godparents (still my favorite relatives) and I rode the luggage rack up the escalators (which were absolutely huge to a 5 year old who had never seen escalators before).
I always get a sense of peace and longing when i remember those days. Coming to Montreal always seemed like a grand adventure, since we only came every 2 years while I was living out west.
2. Family dinners around my grandmother's table. We would visit her once a month and order Benny's Chicken (my mother's favorite). My godmother and cousin would come, and my grandmother would feed us lots of sweets. My grandfather always had chocolate bars hidden in his room; he'd come into the kitchen with a bag and be mobbed by my brother and cousin. I miss that house (my mother grew up there, and i've always associated it with my grandparents) and my grandparents (they died over the past 2 years).
3. I used to visit my grandmother in Alberta every second year (the years we didn't come to Montreal). I remember waking up at some ungodly hour and stealing into the living room to play Intellivision (a real treat, as i didn't have any video games). Then my step-grandfather would get up and play with me til the rest of the house woke up a few hours later. He used to let me win, though he swore he didn't.
4. My grandfather's best friend lived a few houses down from my grandparents. While i was living with my grandparents in grade 3, i used to go over to his house for breakfast a few times a week. He was lonely (widowed, kids all grown up) and loved the company. He fixed bicycles in his garage, and would let me test them to see if they were working right. I'm still angry that no one told me he had died until a month after his funeral (this was only a few years ago, not when i was young).
5. My great-grandmother used to throw parties for the whole family (200+ people) every New Years. She'd rent a ballroom in a hotel and hire a live band and everything. I remember dancing to the band and playing hide and seek with my second cousins in the coat piles.
so it's just occured to me that i haven't felt that peaceful or accepted since my childhood. strange how my family has been such a source of grief and trauma for me, yet they also provide some of my happiest memories (well, my some of my grandparents, anyway). amazing what you remember when people are taken away from you. i suppose it's because i've watched nearly all of them die in the past few years (i've only got my father's parents left; my mother's parents and both step-grandparents died in the past 3 years).
1. I remember arriving at Mirabel airport when I was about 5. It was just before Christmas, about midnight, and Montreal was lit up as only Montreal can be, with thousands of lights and the distinctive patterns of the Island and shores. The mountain fairly glowed and the plane circled a few times before setting down. We were met by my godparents (still my favorite relatives) and I rode the luggage rack up the escalators (which were absolutely huge to a 5 year old who had never seen escalators before).
I always get a sense of peace and longing when i remember those days. Coming to Montreal always seemed like a grand adventure, since we only came every 2 years while I was living out west.
2. Family dinners around my grandmother's table. We would visit her once a month and order Benny's Chicken (my mother's favorite). My godmother and cousin would come, and my grandmother would feed us lots of sweets. My grandfather always had chocolate bars hidden in his room; he'd come into the kitchen with a bag and be mobbed by my brother and cousin. I miss that house (my mother grew up there, and i've always associated it with my grandparents) and my grandparents (they died over the past 2 years).
3. I used to visit my grandmother in Alberta every second year (the years we didn't come to Montreal). I remember waking up at some ungodly hour and stealing into the living room to play Intellivision (a real treat, as i didn't have any video games). Then my step-grandfather would get up and play with me til the rest of the house woke up a few hours later. He used to let me win, though he swore he didn't.
4. My grandfather's best friend lived a few houses down from my grandparents. While i was living with my grandparents in grade 3, i used to go over to his house for breakfast a few times a week. He was lonely (widowed, kids all grown up) and loved the company. He fixed bicycles in his garage, and would let me test them to see if they were working right. I'm still angry that no one told me he had died until a month after his funeral (this was only a few years ago, not when i was young).
5. My great-grandmother used to throw parties for the whole family (200+ people) every New Years. She'd rent a ballroom in a hotel and hire a live band and everything. I remember dancing to the band and playing hide and seek with my second cousins in the coat piles.
so it's just occured to me that i haven't felt that peaceful or accepted since my childhood. strange how my family has been such a source of grief and trauma for me, yet they also provide some of my happiest memories (well, my some of my grandparents, anyway). amazing what you remember when people are taken away from you. i suppose it's because i've watched nearly all of them die in the past few years (i've only got my father's parents left; my mother's parents and both step-grandparents died in the past 3 years).
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Family
Date: 2003-03-04 06:56 am (UTC)From:I guess if there's a lesson from your childhood, you may look back at the time you're having now and say, "Wow, that was pretty fucking wicked"- even to the crappy memories you're building on now. I mean, hey, you might look back on that two bedroom apartment, four or five kids down the line, and say, "What the hell is wrong with me. I mean, the neighbors were noisy, but I didn't have to live with them. That's it, kids, mommy's had too many of you and one of you is going to Abu Dabi. We're drawing straws. You too, Matt. (God, I hope it's me.)"
Re: Family
Date: 2003-03-04 04:47 pm (UTC)From:Well...
Date: 2003-03-04 04:52 pm (UTC)From:Re: Well...
Date: 2003-03-04 05:51 pm (UTC)From:Re: Well...
Date: 2003-03-04 05:53 pm (UTC)From:HAPPY BIRTHDAY! (well, in 3 hours anyway)
now you can't say i forgot... *evil grin*