plans falling thru all 'round...

so no car, no movie, no nite out. can't even make it out to Passeport tomorrow nite unless (by some miracle) i can get my car before then. buses make things too complicated, and i don't trust the buses to get me there before the metros stop for the night.

spent a good day with ford, traipsing up and down the island. i have a bruise the size of a nickel on my arm from the doctor (bloody hell, you'd think he'd learn to be a bit gentler when taking blood!), a full stomach from SG's wonderful cooking, and way too much energy. i want to go out, damn it. i want to drive endlessly for hours, with no thought to where or why. i want to sing along to good music at any volume i want, with only my close friends to hear me (and join in). i want a weekend up north, where i can (hopefully) ground and center properly for the first time in a year or two.

i'm feeling all out of sorts, and kinda twitchy/nervous/depressed/restless/anxious. never knew the simple lack of freedom would get to me this much. i don't know what i'm gonna do if this parking thing doesn't work itself out; somehow the thought of not having access to my car until April does not inspire thoughts of happy pink bunnies and pretty flowers.

more and more, i think the first thing i do when i get my debts payed off and a better job is buy a car. i wanted a vacation first (either Europe or out west, depending) but the car thing is getting more and more pressing. and, tempted as i am to talk my father into selling me the Honda, i KNOW i don't want a car previously owned by my father. he does NOT take good care of his vehicles. i swear, if i didn't wash the Honda when i borrow it, it would never be washed, clean, etc. gah.

alright, i've rambled on long enough. let's see if i can put my newest story idea into some kind of coherent order in writing...